By Robert Gauthier, MSW, LCSW
For many men, seeking help for emotional struggles is not easy.
Cultural expectations around masculinity discourage vulnerability, making it harder for men to reach out for support, especially when it comes to dealing with trauma.
However, left unaddressed, trauma can have serious consequences, impacting both mental and physical health.
But with help, healing is possible.
The Men’s Program at Penn Medicine Princeton House Behavioral Health offers a safe, trust-filled environment for men who have experienced traumatic events that are impacting their well-being and overall functioning.
60% of All Men
In simple terms, trauma is an emotional response to a distressing or life-threatening event which overwhelms an individual’s ability to cope.
The National Center for Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) estimates that 60% of all men experience at least one traumatic event during their lifetime.
Traumatic events may take on many forms and can include:
- Physical, sexual or emotional abuse
- Childhood neglect
- Bullying
- Homelessness or homelessness as a child
- Divorce
- Accidents or disasters
- Mass shootings or terrorist attacks
- Exposure to death or serious injury (first responders, military personnel)
- Sudden loss of a loved one
Additionally, about 8% of men, roughly one in 12, will suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder at some point in their lives.
Red Flags
Trauma can show up in many ways. It can surface as anxiety, depression, substance use, and trouble sleeping. Other common red flags include:
- Flashbacks or intrusive memories
- Hypervigilance, always being on alert for danger and startling easily
- Periods of intense prolonged distress
- Social isolation, avoiding friends and family
- Feeling emotionally numb
- Anger and irritability
- Difficulty concentrating
- Avoiding situations or people that are reminders of the trauma
- Panic attacks
- Overcompensating in other areas of your life such as at work or at school
- Unexplained physical pain
These symptoms often interfere with daily life, making it difficult to focus at work, maintain relationships, or feel emotionally connected to others.
For many men, the impact of a traumatic event can take months or even years to recognize. Often, memories resurface unexpectedly.
The birth of a child or a child reaching the age a parent was when abused can be significant triggers. Tragedy and loss can also trigger memories of trauma, especially in a world where gun violence, terrorism, war and natural disasters seem to be more and more prevalent.
In some cases, people who previously exhibited no signs of past trauma will have symptoms of PTSD following a distressing current event.
Seeking Help is Sign of Strength
While it can be difficult for anyone to confront a past trauma, men tend to be more hesitant to seek help, even when it’s affecting their daily life.
There are several reasons for this, including cultural norms that often encourage men to “tough it out,” and fear of appearing weak or vulnerable.
In addition, many men may not recognize their symptoms as trauma-related and may view them as personal failings or just “how life is.”
However, recognizing the effects of trauma and knowing when to get help is not a sign of weakness, but rather a sign of strength.
A Safe Place
The Men’s Program at Princeton House provides men a safe place where they can share their experiences with trauma and its impact without fear of criticism.
The program helps men understand the many ways trauma can impact their life and helps them articulate what they’re going through, which are the first steps toward healing.
Men have access to individual therapy, group therapy, psychoeducation groups, skills groups, and medication monitoring by a psychiatrist. Treatment includes a comprehensive evaluation and medical management by a board certified psychiatrist or advance practice psychiatric nurse and an individualized recovery plan.
Men also learn tools to help them tolerate distressing feelings and emotions, such as:
- Grounding. Grounding techniques anchor a person in the present moment, helping them feel more connected to their body and surroundings when they’re overwhelmed by flashbacks, anxiety, or dissociation. Grounding techniques can be physical, mental, or sensory. For example, someone might use the 5-4-3-2-1 method—naming five things they can see, four they can touch, three they can hear, two they can smell, and one they can taste—to reorient their focus. Others might carry a textured object, such as a smooth stone or piece of fabric, to hold during moments of stress. Counting backwards, focusing on breath, or repeating a calming phrase are also grounding techniques.
- Containment. The containment strategy is a therapeutic technique to help individuals manage overwhelming thoughts, emotions, or memories by mentally “containing” them in a safe and controlled way. The idea is to create a symbolic space—such as a locked box, a vault, or a container with a secure lid—where distressing material can be temporarily stored, allowing the person to function without being consumed by painful experiences. For example, someone might visualize placing a traumatic memory inside a box and locking it, knowing they can revisit it later in a safe environment, such as during a therapy session. This strategy doesn’t deny or suppress trauma but offers a way to set boundaries with intrusive thoughts, giving individuals a sense of control and emotional relief.
- Radical acceptance. Radical acceptance means accepting reality as it is even if you don’t like it or it’s painful. It’s not approval or giving up, it’s acknowledging that fighting reality only causes more suffering. This is powerful in situations where you can’t change what happened, but you can change how you respond.
The Men’s Program is currently available at Princeton House’s Princeton, Eatontown, North Brunswick, and Moorestown sites and will be available at the Hamilton site later this spring.
For more information about the Men’s Program at Penn Medicine Princeton House Behavioral Health, call (888) 437-1610 or visit www.princetonhouse.org.
Robert Gauthier, MSW, LCSW, is a licensed clinical social worker and a primary therapist with Penn Medicine Princeton House Behavioral Health.
